Coffee Habits: 10 Things People Do with the First Cup of the Day |
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by R J Evans, Jul 27, 2008 |
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People are as numerous and diverse as pebbles on a beach. Most, though, will have some sort of morning ritual, designed to start the day. For many of them, that will involve the wondrous potion known to the world as coffee. Here are ten things that people do while they take their morning coffee. Do you recognize yourself here? |
Get The Kids Ready For School“Mothers are those wonderful people who can get up in the morning before the smell of coffee.” - Author Unknown
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There's nothing like children. You can learn a lot from them, like how much patience you actually have, for example. Ralph Waldo Emerson compared them to curly dimpled lunatics and that is pretty much how they can be in the morning, yelling, screaming and generally reducing your once neat existence to that of Stig of the Dump on a good day. Fortunately, the coffee is there while you get them ready and ponder the chores for the day. That said, cleaning a house with children is like trying to clear the front yard while it is still snowing. Have another coffee and forget about the housework! Prepare Yourself Mentally for the Day“Way too much coffee. But if it weren't for the coffee, I'd have no identifiable personality whatsoever.” - David Letterman
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For many, coffee is a vital ingredient in the daily preparation for another twenty four hours on the planet. Without it, there could be no mental gearing up for the grind of the workplace. After all, tomorrow's success is determined by today's preparation and without that cup of coffee, you can just forget it. With just a little preparation over a cup of coffee, most people gain the confidence they need to get through. Everything else, after all, is beyond your control. Choose - To Decaf or not to Decaf?“Decaffeinated coffee is kind of like kissing your sister.” - Bob Irwin
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Quotation aside, it is often a difficult decision and one people sometimes prevaricate over by making two different pots of coffee and then deciding which one to drink when the crunch finally comes. Ah, indecision, the graveyard of good intentions! The caffeinated choice usually wins out. After all, life is stressful enough already. So many people used to be indecisive about this issue, but they're not sure now. Of course, that may or may not be their problem. Somebody, get me my coffee now! Contemplate a Healthier Lifestyle“Coffee, the finest organic suspension ever devised.” ~ Captain Catherine Janeway, Star Trek, Voyager
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I really must get fit again, people mumble over their morning coffee, while contemplating the drift southwards of parts of their bodies that used to be pert and springy. Do not worry, this will pass. Content yourself with the fact that fitness is the domain of body fascists - to coin an eighties term - and you are far too politically correct - to coin a nineties term - to engage in such activities. Then have another cup of coffee and try and get with the century. Get Over Last Night's Hangover“I believe humans get a lot done, not because we're smart, but because we have thumbs so we can make coffee.” ~Flash Rosenberg
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Sometimes you can overdo it - for whatever reason. Perhaps you got promotion, perhaps you got lucky. Perhaps you do it every night. Whatever the case, when you are feeling the wrath of grapes, there is nothing quite like a strong, long cup of coffee. You probably know the scenario - first you have a drink. Then, the drink has a drink. Finally, the drink has you. The restorative properties of a coffee may be poo pooed by some but who cares if it a pseudo placebo. We don't care! Just give us coffee! Meet Up With Friends“Behind every successful woman is a substantial amount of coffee” - Stephanie Piro
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There is an old Hasidic proverb that if you look for a friend that has no faults, then you will never find one. This may be true, but remember too that a friend will love us you even though they know you so well. So what better than a morning meet with an old friend and a chat about life, the universe and everything over a steaming cup of coffee? It may be rushed and on the way to work, but grasping that mug is reassuring, when giving your friends a piece of your mind or tentatively confessing to that office indiscretion you swore never to talk about. Hurrah for coffee! Meditate on Life's Great Impossibilities“Everybody should believe in something. I believe I'll have another cup of coffee.” - Unknown
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Pondering the great imponderables would not be the same without a cup of coffee. You may only find bad reasons for what you believe in - and for even more bad reasons, but the coffee will undoubtedly get you through this. To onlookers it may look like mindless navel gazing but take heart. Most truth arises from what people take at first to be irrelevances. You are not sitting in the coffee shop, eyes glazed and zombie like, not a single thought running through your brain, honestly. With that coffee in your hand you are a philosopher! Just Sing, Sing a Song“I had some dreams. They were clouds in my coffee.” Carly Simon
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A lot of people sing while they are taking their morning coffee, even though a lot will not acknowledge this because they are blissfully unaware that they are doing it. However, the deep seated feeling of happiness a cup of coffee produces will often lead to a spontaneous outburst of song. No matter that you may not ever make it on to American Idol, be proud of your voice and use it. You don't even have to be doing it in the rain to be happy again, just take a swig and open those lungs! As a certain Miss Ella Fitzgerald once said, the only thing better than singing is more singing. Perform Your Daily Balancing Act“The voodoo priest and all his powders were as nothing compared to espresso, cappuccino, and mocha, which are stronger than all the religions of the world combined, and perhaps stronger than the human soul itself.” - Mark Helprin
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Juggling is often a metaphor for the busy lifestyles many of us lead - and part of juggling is balance. If you get it right, then things stay in place and do not come crashing to the ground. Get it wrong and there goes the coffee on to the carpet. You owe it to yourself to find those little pockets of tranquility in your day and just freeze frame for a second or two. Or even fifteen minute, godammit! Once time is frozen, however momentarily, the best companion is perhaps the trusted cup of coffee. Sit back, relax and enjoy! Solve Huge, Gigantic, Enormous, and Colossal Problems“if(pot.coffee=EMPTY){programmer->;brain=OFF}” - Unknown
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Some people seem to be able to get right down to work without any other obvious means of assistance than a cup of coffee. Without it they are unable to function: with it, they appear to have brains the size of a small planet and seem to be able to solve seemingly insoluble problems with just a swig of caffeine. Death and famine might be stalking the land like two giant stalky things, but these people somehow manage to present a solution. It is quite easy to believe that given enough coffee, they could rule the world. People like that deserve your everlasting loathing, coffee or no coffee! The clever swine!
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