Ten Ways to Stay Awake During the Big Vote
It's almost here. The Election Day is upon us. You want to stay up and watch the results. Here are ten ways to stay awake during the long, election night:
- Start making a rubber band ball. This should take you hours to do.
- Read all those Reader Digests that have been collecting dust
- Have your rubber brick on hand whenever the votes don't go your way
- Have your remote control firmly in your grip. Change channels every minute to get all the results.
- Take frequent bathroom breaks in order to maintain your sanity
- Play with your hand held video games until your wrists start to feel as limp as wet noodles
- Check all the results online. Be glued to your computer screen. If anyone tries to disturb you, put some headphones on and make disgustingly annoying faces.
- Eat every snack in the house. This is no time to diet. Our nation needs your attention.
- Insist on taking care of the baby. After all, you're not going to sleep anyway. Perhaps your baby girl can learn about freedom and democracy. (Yeah right)
- Do the election wave. Every time results go your way, stand up and do a jig, reach for the ceiling, and down another doughnut. A glazed doughnut would be best since it would match the look in your eyes.
