Birthday Black was crossing the street, elbows knocking and knees flap- doodling-over and over, the whole crazy scene, himself gallivanting in outlandish garb, the skull-shaped cufflinks clinking, dogs chasing him, the usual carnival swansong. This time he was having a jive heart attack from way back. It was some kind of intergalactic time warp and he knew time would make him jump back in the end. From the day he was born, he knew someday he'd have to react. He kept crackin' his spine "Pop!" "Crack!" He said it was good for his back Over and over again, they kept sendin' him back.
As if trying to make him react or pay for something, and sometimes it felt like he was under attack. Whatever it was, he knew something was happening to him and sooner or later, he'd have to react. He always useta crack his spine so nice-“Crack!" "Pow!" "Crunch!”-very crisp loud popping sounds. That was his calling card, pulling himself up by his own bootstraps like that. He did it whenever he entered a room. Old beady- eyed Anti-Anyone, old Birthday Black. I never knew another man to crack his own spine all the time like that-“Pop!" "Crack!”-the way he did. But he said it was good for his back, and after a while most people got used to it, some of them muttering under the breath how the old man had no tact. And it made him want to react. But without him, who would the monsters attack? He always felt like he was standing right between mankind and total destruction.
Smack dab in the middle, one thin layer between the human race and total destruction. Global warming, whether or not the human race would be annihilated by radioactivity, it all depended on him. His life was the proving ground, one last chance for mankind to survive, and he had to keep on jumping back so he wouldn't lose track, bumping and jumping and doing his funky soulful jive groove moves. His friends never knew he was one thin layer between them and doom. "I'm a secret agent, ma'am." That's what he told people. When, in fact, the whole time he was secretly jumping back! (it was a thing he did inside himself.)
