Given most men's love for the automobile, I thought it was time to unveil what their individual choices say about them. It has been said that the clothes make the man but what about their cars? Some men choose them for very clear and specific reasons, others choose them based on necessity only but regardless of what men drive, the car gives us an impression (fairly or unfairly) that some men may or may not necessarily fit.
Cars are icons, especially for most North American males. Style, colour, size, speed, comfort, luxury, sport, utility, economy, extravagance - whatever adjective we can attribute to our cars speak volumes about their owners too! In fact, certain rides frequently appeal to certain demographics so much that you can practically tell the type of vehicle a guy drives by simply giving him the once over. And even though there are exceptions to every rule, I know I'll take some heat from these anyways but, what the heck.
Mid-Full Sized SUVs (BMW X5; Porsche Cayenne; Hummer H2)
Ambitious middle-senior management non-intellectual types; Aggressive men who believe they've earned the right to drive anyway they like while taking calls and checking their Blackberrys; These are the guys who cut you off without noticing (or caring) but will make a point of flipping you off if you do it in return; Leases his ride and, if you followed him home, he'd have an equally excessive house probably mortgaged to the hilt
Over-Priced Sports cCars (Corvette; Viper; Mustangs)
Very well represented category of men doused in cologne and so full of insecurity you can practically cut it with a knife; Most of these guys haven't the slightest idea how to actually handle their rides apart from flooring it and the occasional intentioned tire squeal; Usually bored men, unsatisfied with one or more aspects of their lives looking to inject some youthful excitement and, while these men often look ridiculous, they are usually the ones with the paid-off homes and chunky savings accounts
Land Yachts (Buick Park Avenue, Cadillac, Lincoln)
If it isn't already self-evident! But these men are the “gentlemen” of days gone by - when big cars were all that existed and gave the impression of a good family provider; at this point in their lives, most of these men don't buy green bananas and check the obituaries to see if their still alive and, for those of us on the roads, we wouldn't mind knowing as well.
Full-Sized Domestic Pick-Up Trucks (Dodge Ram, Ford F150, GMC Sierra)
Trucks are built for utility but when they are fitted for your everyday ride with “fear this” stickers; NASCAR decals or, my personal favourite, Calvin pee'ing on the competition's logo, you can rightfully expect you are dealing with a guy who has little regard for fashion, shirt sleeves, wildlife, environment, their home, sustained sobriety, condoms, peace and quiet; these guys work to two reasons - to party and to maintain their rides.
Pimped-Out Econo-Boxes (Honda Civic; Mitsubishi Eclipse; Chevrolet Cavaliers)
The owners of these booming, bright-coloured, after-market fitted eyesores are the gear heads of the 21st century and today's gear heads are smarter, richer and daring than those of previous generations; Highly apt to lose their cars for street-racing, these are guys who seem to have endless cash, a foul mouth and nothing but time on their hands.
Minivan (Dodge Grand Caravan; Pontiac Montana)
This guy is married to the gal who's live began with children; their home is probably suburban and boring and decorated with Little Tykes; This guy has most likely delegated responsibility for the household finances to his wife and when asked to make decisions, he's careful to make his wife and family's priorities his; these guys are usually glum until they morph into the Corvette category later in life
Economy Car, Hybrid vehicle, Public Transit or Bicycle (Toyota Prius; Ford Focus; Honda Civic)
The guys utilizing these rides are usually your sensible, responsible types. These guys are often intellectuals and, at times, somewhat self-righteous. And though most of these guys are truly non-pretentious with nothing to prove, there is a growing “snobbery” among these guys as environmentally friendlier efforts become more and more revered.
Okay, okay. I admit I've drawn some rather sweeping generalizations from my observations so end this knowing two things: it is meant in good fun, and keep your eyes open on the roads and I'll bet you'll agree with much of it!
