15 Ways to Kill a Job Interview |
|
|
|
by Steven West, Dec 25, 2007 |
|
|
A humorous list of fifteen sure-fire ways to kill a job interview. |
- Wear a tie-dye tee shirt with khaki shorts
- Look at your watch every ten seconds while scraping the dirt out of your fingernails
- Tap your fingers on the interviewer's desk while staring at the wall.
- Tell the interviewer that he is very handsome, for a bald man.
- Express to the interviewer that your greatest strengths are eating and sleeping.
- Jump up and down while explaining to the interviewer that you really need to go to the bathroom.
- Stick a pencil in your ear to get rid of excessive earwax.
- Tell the interviewer that you have a solid record of under achievement and that you never arrive to work on time
- Agree that sexual harassment is a problem in the work place and that you are part of the problem
- Ask the interviewer if he minds that you floss your teeth while you answer his questions.
- Apologize for letting out a fart just before you leave. Excuse yourself and explain that you just had a bowl of chili for lunch.
- Ask about the company's family leave policy. Let it be known that your wife is pregnant with triplets.
- Express the fact that you have a bladder control problem, but not to worry since you wear “Depends.”
- Ask the interviewer if she is pregnant and respond in shock when you find out that she isn't.
- Ask if the company has a life insurance policy since you only have 2 months to live.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Koyin