I'm sorry I'm late, but……
Having been a restaurant manager for many years, I've heard uncountable and various excuses about why staff have not been on time for shifts. These are just a few of my personal favourites:
- I crashed/broke down/ran out of petrol
- Not implausible you may think, but one of the people to give me this excuse didn't even have a driving licence!
- I forgot where I worked
- Maybe they had bumped their head in the car crash from excuse number one?
- Mum forgot to wash my uniform
- I didn't realise that I worked staff so hard they were too tired to do their own laundry!
- Sorry I'm late, the police only released me two hours ago.
- I'm innocent, honest.
- Isn't everyone?
- I was doing my hair
- This I believed. Guys are much vainer than girls - this guy had probably spent half an hour getting every spike just perfect. I'm glad he was the waiter, not the cook, his hair was a definite fire risk.
- And another favourite excuse from a male-
- It was my girlfriend's time of the month
- That is, most fertile time of the month. Come to think of it, their baby was also late, four days overdue to be precise.
- I ran over my dog
- That would be the darling pedigree show winner that had never been mentioned before.
- I forgot to put my clock forward/back
- Like I didn't remind you at least ten times yesterday.
- This, however, is my favourite excuse for lost time-
- I think it was aliens
- Flashing lights? Strange looking men? That was at the night club where you got your hangover last night actually.
Of course, there are a whole load of excuses that have been used, all more than once, these were by no means unique (except, maybe the one about the aliens) but they are the ones I found most funny. I hope they've given you a giggle too.
