What I've Learned Watching Zombie Movies |
|
|
|
by Roxan Finnell, Jun 5, 2008 |
|
|
A humorous look at zombie movies and the lessons we can learn from them in order to be prepared if a zombie outbreak ever occurs. |
- If your town is taken over by zombies it's a not a good thing to piss off the living people around you. They know how to lock the door.
- Do not open large cannisters that have eyes looking up at you and say “Property Of The U.S. Army” on them.
- Zombies never get full.
- Some people are immuned from becoming a zombie. You're probably not one of them.
- Zombies are capable of running faster than you think.
- Zombies can be kept as pets with the proper use of restraints.
- Newborn zombies have no teeth and therefore not subject to the same laws governing adult zombies.
- Some idiot will always get too close.
- Zombies like to munch on extremities.
- Zombies are loyal and only eat non-zombies.
- Do not call the number on the large cannister.
- You can use a zombie infestation to rid of the world of people you don't like. “Well he looked like a zombie.”
- It is not a good idea to cremate chemically engineered zombies.
- Zombies like brain food.
- Zombie kids will eat their parents.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Meanwhile, to survive the zombie uprising: http://www.purpleslinky.com/Offbeat/How-to-Survive-a-Zombie-Uprising.213917