Hello happy internet readers. I'll have to ask you to forward this article to the people in your life whom suffer from constant, ridiculous boredom: I already know you don't personally suffer from this defect. I have to admit that I suffer from the malaise of life every now and again. During those times when I'd lie on the Burger King wrapper littered floor of my darkened apartment I'd wonder what I could possibly do with my free time that was neither illegal or unethical (not to mention dangerous). Well, after taking my required medication, I've come up with a list of ten great things to do when you're bored.
Read a book, aloud, at an inappropriate place and time.
I find reading a soothing activity that sparks the imagination. It's nice to share it with others whether they realize they need it or not. Be a pal and read aloud during church services, moments of silence or wherever your booming recital of Jackie Collin's latest work would be most appreciated.Go for a walk, in the nude.
Everyone likes to be naked and everyone loves a nice walk on a nice day. Why not combine both activities for double the fun. Walking past a school is not advised.Talk to a friend on the phone, and tell them ridiculous lies about their boyfriend.
Who doesn't love a good yarn? Let your imagination and inventiveness carry you away from the humdrum of life. Tell the tall tales they'll be talking about for years to come.Get a new hobby, like drunk-rolling.
Not only is rolling a drunk good, old fashioned fun-it can be profitable!Do some gardening, unauthorized, of your neighbor's yard.
Let your neighborly spirit carry you away and do that much needed pruning of you neighbors yard. Don't forget to put your own artistic spin on whatever you like for maximum personalization.Volunteer ... for active duty.
You'll never be bored serving you country oversees. Sign up for more than one tour.Join a club of radical Christian Fundamentalists.
If you never know what to say, joining a group of radicals is the way to make friends who will always have something to say. And they have pamphlets to go with their talks. Three hour speeches and reading material; how did you get so lucky?Watch TV in every room at the highest possible setting.
If you are feeling lonely, let the TV provide the ambient people noise you need. Late at night is a good time for this activity: it will be just like you were having a real party with smart sophisticates.Go out to a fine restaurant and act the fool.
One of my personal favorites. Go out to dinner. Don't pay, don't tip, ask for off-menu items, complain about the temperature...generally, act like an unhappy person. The staff of the restaurant will bend over backwards to try and make you happy. It will be just like you're back in mom's loving bosom again.Write ridiculously funny lists of things you can do when you're bored.
