A few years ago, I was getting head from my then-girlfriend right before we were to go eat Mexican for dinner. I hadn't come in a few days, and consequently, pumped a solid five-roper into her mouth which she swallowed whole. As soon as she had recovered, I said smugly, "So, are you ready to go?" to which she replied, "Actually, I'm full."
From a married girl I hooked up with: "This feels weird, you're built just like my husband."
An exchange with some nutcase: Me: "Are you kidding me? I love rap. I'm like half black." Crazychick: "Yeah, from the waist down." That was a nice confidence booster.
This isn't really pillow talk; it's more incoherent babble, but still funny. After I broke up with my girlfriend of two years, I hooked up with a very hot 18 year old who obviously had limited experience. Sex wasn't really working out, so she offered head as consolation. I finally blew my load (no courtesy tap) and immediately I realize she has never swallowed before. She jumps out of my bed, runs to my bedroom door with a mouth full of splooge, and tugs at my door. However, my bedroom door was notoriously hard to open and it wasn't responding at all to her desperate tugs. She jumped up and down, waving her hands in front of her mouth, and gurgled to me "IT WON'T OPEN!" I just laid there laughing hysterically as she fought with my door. She finally got it open after about 10 tries and ran to the sink to spit. Definitely a great moment in hook-up history.
