Men ogle
Highly inquisitive, he does more than look and stare. He ogles. Never mind you're in the middle of an intimate conversation. He mutes you out so he can focus on that passing bombshell. "Please hold, your operator will be with you in just a minute". When caught in this situation, just continue. He may not be listening in the first place.
Men are shopping celibates
He prefers to abstain. Otherwise he'll have to multitask as your driver, your clothes hanger and your bellhop. Remember that he can only do one thing at a time. Furthermore, you're not about to listen to his opinion about that dress even though you asked. Plus you'll have to put up with the grumbling and muttering. Shop the guilt-free way, hang out with the girls.
Men sacrifice
He feels he has an obligation to offer himself as the chosen one to clean out the fridge. Thinking that the chocolate you saved for yourself needs to be savoured quickly, he jumps in to rescue you from those demon calories. He'll sacrifice himself for you, your waist and your thunder thighs. Oh, he notices. There's the ice cream too! He's got to eat it before it melts in the freezer.
Men can't remember
Not your anniversary, and especially not your mother's birthday. It's a thought processing issue. It's selective you see. He wouldn't sweat the small stuff. It's the big events like the soccer league championships and the Grand Prix races that he remembers. Take a number. Fill the back seat. If you're no big sporting event, you don't have a chance.
Men gases
Be happy that he is relaxed when he is with you. It's only in those comfortable moments, that he feels he can just let loose and release his great gastronomic opera. Take comfort that you make him feel this explosive. Not everyone gets to bask in the experience. But if he does it under the blanket, tell him he can take the experience elsewhere.
