Drinking Games for the Incredibly Stupid

Just because you're all grown up doesn't always mean you behave accordingly.

Drinking games have been around for almost as long as there has been booze to play them with. Even though I personally cannot see the point to such lunacy, many people participate in drinking games as a form of entertainment. I have listed six favorite drinking games below in order of idiocy with the least foolish first.

Shotgun

For this game you need a couple of consenting participants, a screwdriver, and cans of beer. Each person makes a small hole in their can of beer near the bottom of the can. When they are told to GO, they put the hole to their mouth, open the top of the can and see who can down their can of beer first. Slow man looses.

Beer Hunter

This game is best played outdoors and with a small group of people. The object of the game is to NOT find the hot can of beer. Before you begin, take one can of beer and shake it very well. Put all beer cans including the shaken can into a bag or box and gently mix them up. Starting with the first player, they must reach in and take a beer. While holding the beer on an angle facing toward their head, they must open the beer can. If they didn't choose the hot beer, they drink that beer and the next player chooses a beer. The game plays on until the hot beer is found. That player is out of the game, (wet, and disgustingly smelly) another beer is shaken and the remaining survivors play until there is one player left standing.

Boat Race

This is a team game. Each team must have the same amount of players and must form a line standing shoulder to shoulder. At the sound of the whistle, the first person in each line must drink their beer and then places their empty glass on their heads. Then the second in line follows suit until each person in line has drunk their beer and the empty glass is on top of their heads. (See? I told you it was dumb) The first team to finish all their beers wins the game.

Threshold

For this game you can play with either two people or in teams of two. You will need one die, one quarter, an empty cup, and a line of shots. One person will be the shaker and the other is the shakee. The shaker takes the quarter and die and places them in the cup. Holding one hand over the opening of the cup, they shake it vigorously. When they are done, the cup should be up side down with their hand covering the opening on the bottom. The quarter and die should be covered by the cup and sitting on their hand. The shakee must guess either heads of tails of the quarter. If they are right it is their turn to be the shaker but if they are wrong, they must drink the number of drinks that the die indicates and they are the shakee again.

Twelve before Twelve

This is a game that can only be played on New Years Eve in England. The object of the game is to line up twelve pints of beer and on the first chime of countdown from Big Ben, begin drinking the twelve beers. You must finish drinking all twelve beers by the time the last chime has sounded for the New Year. Records show that to date, no one has won the Twelve before Twelve drinking game and at one pint of beer per chime, it isn't likely that anyone ever will.

Dwarf Tossing

Dwarf Tossing began in the mid 80s and is still a big attraction grabber in certain parts of the world. Even though many people consider it an offensive sport, I am told little people have made a living off of the events. The object of the game is to see who can throw a dwarf the furthest. There are two ways of playing depending on what bar you visit. The first version is to throw a (willing) little person dressed in padded suit into a small stack of mattresses seeing who can throw him the furthest. The second version is to throw a Velcro clad dwarf at a Velcro covered wall hoping to make them stick to the wall. The person to throw them the furthest is the winner.

Warning

The idea of this article is not to encourage drinking. It is merely written as entertainment. In the event that someone decides to play one of the games listed here, please do not hold the author responsible for your stupidity.

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Comments (21)
#1 by lanne
Mar 5, 2008
I thought I had heard of everything. These are crazy!! I think I`ll stick to a nice glass of wine and a game of Gin Rummy though.
#2 by CHAN LEE PENG
Mar 5, 2008
Very interesting, thanks!
#3 by Joe Poniatowski
Mar 5, 2008
Whatever happened to plain old Quarter Bounce? It's been a long time since I've been out of college, but some of these games seem too complex when the goal is to obliterate one's self. Very interesting, though.
#4 by IcyCucky
Mar 5, 2008
I have heard of shotgun, but the other ones are new to me.
#5 by Alexa Gates
Mar 5, 2008
very interesting... I always thought beer pong was weird ;)
#6 by Maria Elle
Mar 5, 2008
You've done it again. Why anyone would want to drink five pints of beer will always elude me, but well done.
Seeing as I'm still in school, trying these would not only be illegal but also exeedingly stupid. BRILLIANT article nonetheless!
#7 by TP Sage
Mar 5, 2008
I will never play any of these (though I make no claims of NOT being stupid)but I had great fun reading about them. Well done.
#8 by louie jerome
Mar 5, 2008
Funny but to glasses of red wine renders me incapable of doing anything except falloing asleep, so I think I'll give the games a miss.
#9 by louie jerome
Mar 5, 2008
..erm... I mean TWO glasses!
#10 by Dee Huff
Mar 5, 2008
You're right, they are incredibly stupid games, but I guess it takes all sorts.
#11 by valli
Mar 5, 2008
All games are new to me.
#12 by Judy Sheldon
Mar 5, 2008
Do they think turning it into a game makes getting wasted acceptable? Darlene, this was entertaining.
#13 by Lucy Lockett
Mar 6, 2008
That was entertaining, throwing a dwarf sounds so funny especially the velcro one. I saw that on tele once, strange habits !!
#14 by Ruby Hawk
Mar 6, 2008
Very interesting and as you said stupid. Entertaining though. Best luck,Ruby
#15 by Nick Kenney
Mar 7, 2008
I've heard of the shotgun but none of the others...don't think I've missed much... great job, Darlene!
#16 by KathySpring
Mar 7, 2008
Don't you think people could come up with better entertainment? Guess not great article!!
KathySpring
#17 by Susan B. Anna
Mar 10, 2008
I only knew of the shotgun and the beer hunter, the rest are interesting at best and exceptionally dumb. Thanks again though Darlene for a very entertaining read.

Susan
#18 by drAnn
Mar 12, 2008
Not drinking myself, I have never played any on these games but I remember one party way back "when" where the already tipsy participants decided it would be fun to turn a then-popular kid's game into a game for adults. They blindfolded a person, fed him (or her!) another beer, spun him around and had him try to pin the tail on a Donkey. Whoever he ended up trying to pin it on instead was next, and so on, apparently until they all fell down. Just another reason I don't drink.
#19 by Demelza
Apr 20, 2008
Im proud to say Ive played over half of these games!

It may seem like im stupid, but I had alot of fun!
#20 by Stovey
May 31, 2008
I like the beer hunter personally. But my favorite drinking game is having a bunch of people watching Eddie Griffins standup and drinking every time he says the N word. No one ever makes it to the end.

Beer pong is the funnest though.

Good job Darlene.

Armywriter
#21 by yfiitnjd
Jun 21, 2008
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